Cheez-It + Chocolate

There are many combinations in the world which just work, whether it be due to some divine force, or to marketing tactics, we as consumers find many combinations to be perfectly natural. Peanut butter and jelly, ketchup and mustard, ham and cheese, the list can go on for some time. What makes these combos so great? why should we have to be chained to the archaic idea of a "classic combination"? I believe that its time that we as consumers, as eaters, as humans break free from the oppressive notion of classic combinations and realize that there is only one true "Perfect Combination", and that is when the almighty Cheez-It is paired with Milk Chocolate. Nothing can compare to the delectable concoction, of sweet, salty, and savory which is achieved with this combination. Many describe their first experience with the combination as "dream like", "religious", and some have reported to notions of achieving nirvana. with that said, there is no reason to not allow yourself the most perfect of all food combinations. For one, Cheez-Its are delicious alone, as is Chocolate. Add in the fact that it is relatively cheap to acquire these treats in large quantity, and one truly has no excuse to not indulge.

Coming in super late: Peanut Butter and Apple Butter Banana Sandwhich

Why is this combination so good? Simply because peanut butter and apple butter plus bananas make a tasty quick treat. Whether you are home alone bored with nothing to do or need a re-boost this sandwich will change your life. Each component in this amazing sandwich contains nutrients your body needs. But they also give your taste buds a celebration to remember.

I started this creation in college when my mom sent me peanut butter and I just happen to buy bananas and apple butter the day before. Out of complete curiosity I combined peanut butter and apple butter. The taste was so good I added bananas and thus heaven was born. This sandwich typically made with apples inside was replaced with bananas because of my food allergy. But I guarantee if you put all three of these ingredients together your mind will be blown.

I won't go into much detail but here are the healthy reasons to enjoy this sandwich: peanut butter is considered a healthy fat. When eaten in moderation the body will treat it as such. Peanut butter also contains manganese and vitamin B3 (niacin). The bananas are filled with potassium. I'm not a total health nut because surprisingly apple butter is the least healthy choice. Yes it's made from apples but it contains sugar. YUMM! Apple butter is actual good, it's healthier than jelly and has a small amount of fiber.

Now to hit you with imagination! Imagine taking a bite out of this and being hit with the sweet smoothness of the apple butter mixed with the either crunchy or smooth creamy peanut butter and enjoying the banana for its own awesomeness. Don’t like bananas? Try just apple butter and peanut butter together. Don’t like peanut butter? (well that sucks) but you can always use your favorite jelly or just do bananas and apple butter. I do recommend trying apple butter first it’s delicious on toast, fruit, and cheese.

This sandwich is better than other weird food combinations because it’s fun to enjoy, quick to make, and beneficial to the body. The key component is peanut butter because it can go into so many different dishes. However, I enjoy it for its more plain uses like sandwich spreads.

Why should you try it? If none of the reasons above convinced you then think of it as this: It serves as tasty seasonal treats great for any occasion. It’s a good meal for those not so creative in the kitchen and if your dog just so happens to get ahold of it he will enjoy it as well. This sandwich appeals to all ages. No matter if you’re a toddler, child, teenager, young adult or adult this can fill tummies with its happiness.

I recommend this weird food combination to anyone and everyone. It’s one of the best moments you could create for yourself besides just eating a banana. There’s not much I else I can say for this sandwich expect to go and try it for yourself!!!!

Cucumber Peanut Butter Sandwich

To all you peanut butter lovers, I have a new way to enjoy the simplicity of a peanut butter sandwich. All you do is add freshly cut cucumber slices! The garden-fresh cucumber adds a bit of a crunch and a fresh twist to the sandwich. Personally, I think to enjoy it, you can’t just sort of like peanut butter since it’s the main component that you taste. To me peanut butter is the go to ingredient to make snacks different. I’ll add peanut butter to almost any snack like fruit, smoothies, Oreos, or sometimes a simple spoon full of Jiff’s Natural Peanut butter will do the trick. When eating a peanut butter sandwich, I typically add some sort of fruit or fruit jelly, but for my last sandwich, I decided to switch things up a bit. According the VegWeb, a vegan friendly website, adding cucumber to your sandwich simply gives the sandwich a little kick. I think it lightens it up because peanut butter is to thick and the cucumber’s lack of strong taste evens it out.  Cucumbers have a lot more to offer than they are given credit. They are a great substitute for chips or crackers. They are cold and firm so they can be dipped in humus or ranch dibs. Even just eating them by themselves is good, so naturally when the idea to put them on my peanut butter sandwich came up, I was all for it. 

            I think it easily became on of my favorite combinations of food!  I can just cut up a cucumber, stick it in my peanut butter sandwich and I have a healthy delicious snack with me wherever I go. It’s a perfect snack to eat after school, on the go, or after rock climbing. Typically jelly is turned to when making a sandwich with peanut butter in to but cucumbers is a much healthier alternative. Cucumbers are good sources of vitamin B, so it’s perfect for a pick me up, and they are mainly made up of water. Plus peanut butter is an easy source protein making this a perfect for after a work out.

            Just recently I have been introduced to this creation. I didn’t surprise me this existed since celery and peanut butter are a common combination; cucumbers were boned to be next.  After trying the sandwich, I continued to dip the slices in to the left over peanut butter and I liked that more than putting it in to a sandwich. The ratio is better so the peanut butter is toned down a little more. Most people I tell about my new discovery automatically discard the idea of it being good but the refreshing qualities of a cucumber make it a perfect side kick to the stickier, think peanut butter. Even my mom, who doesn’t like odd combinations, gave it a try and enjoyed the new snack.  This is a food combination not to out of the ordinary yet still unknown to the public, yet such a healthy way to enjoy a healthy sandwich.

Pickles/Frosting/Society/Innuendo

I know this is supposed to be a fun last blog-post, but I'm not a big food guy. Consequently, this assignment has put me way out of my depth and left me feeling confused, angry, and hopelessly depressed. As a defense mechanism (and page filling mechanism) I'm going to approach this blog-post with such searing austerity as if it were about fiscal policy or human rights, and will only disrupt this very serious tone to make room for the occasional clipart of a pickle with sunglasses on...   

...but enough of that frivolity. The augmentation of the pickle's natural zesty kick with frosting's tender and innocuous embrace has too long been overlooked by today's so-called epicureans. The pickle is a hardy, stalwart, and distinguished ingredient whose modest appearance, culinary versatility, and unaccountably ridiculous name has made it paramount among produce and earned it a special place at the heart of a generation, but we as a society have failed to truly appreciate this tangy miracle of nature. For centuries we've insulted this illusive green beauty by playing it safe, only using it for salads and sandwiches and as unadorned finger-food. Meanwhile, frosting waits neglected and unfulfilled, just sweetness on top of sweetness, all the while longing for a flavorful contrast that could realize it for the latent sensual powerhouse that it is. Anyway, you should try it, that'll make one of us.

"The A La Carte Canape" prepared by The Shit Chef

Let me start off by saying that I am known as an experienced, even expert foodie.  I serve up exquisite platters of nontraditional flavor combinations that world renowned chefs such as Mario Batali and Rachel Ray only dream of concocting. Many critics refer to me as “The Combination King”, “The Sandwich Sultan”, or “The Prince of Panini Production”. Upon seeing my wide array of premium ingredients in my college fridge and infinite selection of imported seasonings in my dresser drawer, a friend rightly states, “Someday you will prepare sustenance for the gods”.

                Now, as I previously implied, I specialize in unorthodox dishes (mostly light, well balanced sandwiches). I live to combine a variety of expensive meat cuts, aged cheeses, freshly picked veggies, and home-made condiments between baked breads to generate my famous club sandwiches. Today you will all be graced with the presentation of one of my many secret recipes: “The a la Carte Canapé”. Thank me later.

                I begin the sandwich with two lightly toasted slices of one of my most cherished ingredients: Wonder Bread. This soft loaf does not lack flavor, and is the heart of the creation. Next, I lather the bottom toast with my divine condiment creation; it includes mayonnaise, ranch dressing, sweet relish, a dollop of YumYum sauce, salt, pepper, more salt (YOLO), ketchup, and finally dashes of Frank’s Red Hot to taste.

                Let’s discuss meat selection. A key component to a sandwich of this caliber is the well balanced, meaty flavor. I start with the pork. Fold 4 slices of ham (water added variety only) on top of the condiments  (be sure to avoid including the salty, distasteful fattening cut of the pig: Bacon). Then I add two slices of bologna and one light scoop of spam for texture. Add ground beef or hamburger. Don’t forget about the light meats. After all, the sandwich is considered a well balanced snack. Choose from your choice of turkey and chicken cold cuts (I prefer to add both).

                Egg and cheese are a must for all of my creations. These ingredients are necessary because the sandwich needs protein and a small amount of fat. For the A La Carte, I crack one egg into a bowl, scramble it, and add salt and pepper. Next, I place two slices of provolone on top. The next part is important. You need to hone in on your inner chef senses and find the correct balance of heat level and time for your microwave. Cook it too long and the egg and cheese will make a mess in the microwave (not cooking the egg long enough may make the sandwich distasteful and/or cause vomiting/food poisoning. The microwave will not be the only hot mess).

                Now we move on to produce. It is imperative to include dill and sweet pickled cucumbers, black and green olives (soaked in salt, obviously), caramelized red onion (use canola oil to caramelize), and sauerkraut. Optional additions include fresh tomatoes and lettuce.

                Scrape the rest of the home-made sauce onto the other slice of toasted wonder bread, place the toast on top, and add a toothpick to hold the finger sandwich together. Voila! Your first of many decadent delights. You’re Welcome?

One meal coming up: Heart Attack in a Bowl ($13.99)

Warning: Do not attempt this as the amount of sodium and other ingredients will cause a significant decrease in health but a huge boost in satisfaction.

          One meal that I would go for when there is nothing else is a cup of ramen and a bag of boiled dumplings. This is the best meal to ingest on any day, considering your diet is going to take a HUGE nosedive towards the red. All of the ingredients you can purchase at any Asian supermarket and are cheap as you can purchase a 12 ramen cup set for about $5 and a dumpling package for $6. The nutrition in this meal does cover the basic needs for your body for the day while having the ability to kill you. So I say that's a good trade-off. Basic nutrition vs. chance of death. YEAH.

          To make this the best meal, you need to prepare it my way. MY WAY IS THE BEST WAY. First, you have to add water/seasoning to the Shin Cup and heat it up in the microwave for 7 minutes. and then 5 minutes. RADIATION OVERKILL. Or you could heat it in an actual pot for 20 minutes and let it sit so the water can be soaked through by the noodles (Remember to add the seasonings). While that's happening, take out (another) pot and add water and place it on the stove so that it heats up. When it bubbles like crazy, add the dumplings and stir so they don't stick. When all the dumplings have risen to the surface, pour the water and dumplings out in a strainer and rinse with cooler water so it doesn't stick post-boil. When all of this is done, add the ramen and dumplings in a bowl and eat it. When finished, make sure you check your heart rate as it may be irregular due to the sodium overload.

Or you might just up-chuck. Either way works

          Despite the unhealthiness of the meal, this is a cheap way to get your nutrition without spending too much money. More importantly, IT'S FREAKIN' DELICIOUS! If you hear about any sales that happen in an Asian supermarket near your location, you need to purchase as many ramen cup sets and dumplings you can carry. The cheapness of the meal and the basic nutrition is the best combination this food combo has to offer. That is, considering you don't suffer from a heart attack or up-chuck your meal.

                                                                                                                        - Nikki "Nikolas" Pham

Pico de gallo in a gyro One of my experiment creations! *Weird sounding but taste AMAZING!*

I have always been known for mixing foods and coming up with creations and etc. So one day I found out about a wrap named (Gyro) it soon became one of my favorite foods! So the day I found out about Pico De Gallo I had one, and it happened to be the same day I had my gyro. So first let me explain what a gyro is for those who may not know. A gyro is a wrap that can come with chicken or lamb and lettuces and tomato, onions, a special sauce wrapped up, it is simply amazinggg!!! So the day I found out about Pico de gallo my cousin was eating it. Now let me explain how the  Pollo de gallo is a spanish cuisine my cousin had was made so this was an uncooked sauce with tomatos and some of the things that are in the gyro; but I've seen that there are different ways to make it, however the way it was made for my cousin was amazing to go with my gyro and it can be eaten with chips. So being curious to how it taste I asked her to let me try it, when I tried it it was amazing. I still had my gyro and I put the Pico de gallo inside the gyro and it gave an extra kick and taste to the gyro! Marinating the sauce with the special sauce in the gyro and everything that comes in the gyro, it was amazing. I always think someone should be open to try something if it involves something that they already like and something else that has the ingredients of something else that you would potentially like.
For me personally I love the lamb gyros but I suppose the chicken gyro will be just as good with Pico de gallo. Being that my family is diverse I have different foods I eat and try so my creativity stays building and I am always creating what someone would call weird but I always suggest gyros to people if they don't know what it is or if they know but haven't tried it; and now that I know about the spanish cuisine I think even if you don't try it with the gyro like me people should try it anyway because it is so good! The Pico de gallo can be made at home and gyros can be gotten at places such as American Bistro, Mama Mia's and other places possibly that sell wraps. So everyone try away! ^ _ ^

Red Lobster's Cheddar Biscuits and Apple Sauce

 Ok here we go. Are you ready for this? My weird food combination is Red Lobster's famous cheddar cheese biscuits and ..... APPLE SAUCE!!!! That's right, apple sauce. Oh my goodness it is so good. I mean the cheddar biscuits are perfect on their own but the combination of the two together is unparalleled. What makes this a combo a match in Heaven is the contrast. You know what they say, opposites attract. The cheddar biscuits are salty to say the least. That's why we love them. They are packed with sodium and cheese which gives them a salty and starchy kind of taste to them and flavor that we crave. The apple sauce on the other hand has the almost exact opposite taste to it. Apple sauce is sweet with a hint of cinnamon in it. It’s also interesting because the biscuits are solids and the apple sauce is more of a liquid but it's not a liquid! (I think I am getting a little too excited about this topic) I like my apple sauce cold but that's just me. I like it cold because it balances out with the warmth of the cheddar biscuit. Let me set the scene for you.

                The red head Red Lobsters waitress places the basket of freshly made cheddar biscuits on your table that you have been yearning for ever since the aroma smacked you in the face when you first walked into the restaurant. You rush in to get the largest biscuit you see and then quickly realize how warm those biscuits actually are. You almost drop it on the table but somehow you hold your composure and gently place it on your plate. You look over to youre apple sauce, pick up a spoon and taste the sweetness of its content before you indulge in the meal that is cheddar biscuits and apple sauce. You pick up your biscuit and rip it into a fourth of a piece. Then you dip the piece into the apple sauce slowly. Why slowly, for dramatic effect of course. Now here comes the best part of the meal, you put the apple sauce covered piece of biscuit in your mouth. Your tongue starts to tingle. Your mouth begins to water. You start to see butterflies and unicorns. What is this feeling that I am feeling, you ask yourself. That, my friend, is the feeling of ecstasy throughout your mouth. (Not the drug but the other ecstasy)

                If you want to know how I stumbled across this pleasant combination, it’s because of my wonderful mother. It was totally by accident. Every year my grandmother celebrates her birthday at Red Lobsters. One year she drops a piece of her biscuit into the apple sauce and decides to take a chance and eat it anyway. She realized that it did not taste as bad as she thought it would and everyone else who tried it also enjoyed this new treat. Ever since then, we have been eating biscuits with apple sauce because it is delicious. We are so determined that when Red Lobster decided to stop serving apple sauce at their restaurants, we would bring our own apple sauce. Yes, it is that good. So the next time you’re at Red Lobsters eating those amazing cheddar biscuits, think of this story and imagine how much better it would be of you had some apple sauce with you. 

CHICKEN AND WAFFLES

Some times when its time for dinner you have a craving for breakfast so what better way to have this meal for dinner. Even though this meal might sound weird or nasty to some but it’s a meal catching on to a lot of people especially in the south is chicken and waffles. And I say don’t knock it till you try it, waffles are a huge staple for breakfast and every one loves fried chicken so why not add both of them together for a meal. To me you can enjoy this wonderful meal for either breakfast or dinner.  The classic flavor combination of sweet and salty is to die for. The chicken is crispy and savory with that fried taste, while the waffles are light, fluffy and sweet and once you add syrup on there its like heaven in your mouth its such a wonderful combination that I feel like every one needs to at least try once in there life time.

 The concept of chicken and waffle was born in Harlem, New York in the 1930’s Wells served many celebrities as they hung out in the late night hours. Many of them could not decide if they wanted breakfast or dinner so why not have both and BAM the creation of chicken and waffles started and is still going strong. And it caught on in the ATL with the building of Gladys Knights chicken and waffles in 1997 and has been going on great ever since. It’s a most try spot when you visit Atlanta or when you live in Atlanta.

 There are many ways to going about eating this wonderful meal. Some people go right for the chicken, saving the waffle for dessert. Others do exactly the opposite; they start with the waffle, because they want to save the chicken for last. You can shred the chicken, put it on the waffle, and pour syrup over the whole thing and eat it like that. I personally eat half chicken then half waffle and back to the chicken and end it with the waffle, switching from salty to sweet is a unique taste I must say the most.

So I end this with next time you are clubbing in the ATL and the end of the night has came and you are not drunk and starving instead of going to waffle house and just be limited to just waffles go to Gladys Knights chicken and waffles they are open to 4am and you will be hooked from there on in. The wonderful taste that I explained earlier or even better when you are drunk and starving you will find yourself asking why I have never enjoyed this wonderful combination. 

by: Kyle Sisneros